cold grey shelter

yea. finally, after all the plans, she had moved to her aunt's place on last sat. on the first day, it was really terrible+miserable. no one went to fetch her. hence she had to move all the 4boxes of heavy books all by herself. this had made her feel really sorry for herself, and moreover, the minute she reached there, all she get was scolding upon scolding by her aunt. at this minute, she just burst into tears. she was crying for few hours. she's not those girls who cries easily, but on that day, she just cant help it. tears just roll down her eyes like any damage water hose-uncontrollable. she cried till her eyes, nose and face were all red and swollen. when her sis knew about it, immediately, she wants her to return home, but she didnt want to end it this way. she had not even stay there for a day, she was still full of hopes, things might turn out better. however, things didnt turn out as she thought. when those adults knew it, they lectured her. no comforting words, they told her that she's big enough and must control her emotions. and, even the adults' kids were making a joke out of her. THEY SAID SHE CRIES LIKE A GOLDFISH!!!. oh man! at that moment, she really hated this family.

days followed, she presence in this family seems 'extra'. she will get scolding or lecturings everyday. they are really strict people. this is what she wants, but the unbearable pressure that not many can take had made her doubt the decision to move there. in times, she will have the urge to leave that cold and grey shelter. she really missed her family. though they are her relatives but she's really sure that she arent part of their family. yea they are under the same roof, but she can sense the barrier with them clearly.

every day is an at least 3hours trip. though she used to wake up even earlier than that daily in that old familar place, but this just seem more tiring and exhausting. perhaps it's the long trip that harden her joints. she could hardly move after every trip. and in the morning, she had to rush for the first bus. if she happens to miss that one, she will then be sure that she definitely will be late.

ytd was a good day for her. no lecturings and things go quite smoothly for her. she was asked to teach her little cousin chinese spelling. she really enjoy this moment. she thinks that this made them closer. she thinks she begins to spot some colours on those not very visible edges of that cold grey shelter.